This week’s newsletter is about humor as a coping tool.
Today’s podcast guest discusses how laughter helped get her and her 5-year-old son through his cancer treatment. My conversation with the lovable, relatable, and HILARIOUS Caitlin Murray is here.
Let’s mix it up this week! Instead of my usual Friday Q&A, this week I’ll publish a collection of stories about finding humor during hard times. So, when has levity helped you cope? Submit your story here!
Health is about having awareness of data and facts, acceptance over the things we can't control, and agency over our life.
Patients often cry in my office. It makes sense. Discussing difficult news or a painful past experience can invite big emotions.
But laughter can also fill the room, sometimes in the most unexpected moments. A few months ago I saw an elderly patient whose wife sent him in. She was anxious about a specific diagnosis she was certain he had. It turned out that he was fine.
I knew it! he exclaimed, My wife needs a chill pill!
At the end of our visit, I asked him, “Would you like me to call your wife on the phone while you’re here…to reassure her, too?” He responded with a sly grin, Dr. McBride, why on Earth would you want to do that to yourself??
Recently I asked a 40-something-year-old mother of three, “So, how much are you drinking these days?” As much as I can! She replied. We chuckled and snorted together. I’m not sure if I followed up on my question.
Humor certainly comes in handy to deny or deflect a tough subject; it can also invite connection.
One of my favorite patients is a man in his 90s. For a decade, we’ve worked on his kidney failure, heart disease, and arthritis. I helped him nurse a broken heart after his wife died. Every time he comes to see me, he has a new joke—usually a G-rated knee-slapper about nuns, rabbis, or talking cats—leaving me in fits of laughter. While his positive attitude alone may not be enough to cure his ailments, I truly believe it has helped prolong his life.
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Laughter and positivity are not a cure-all, but there’s a reason the phrase “Laughter is the Best Medicine” has been needlepointed on pillows for a few generations. We are all going to face hardships, some of them devastating. But heartache and humor may be flip sides of the same coin.
My advice?
Awareness of the data
Studies have shown that laughter and positivity can have a profound impact on both our physical and mental health. Laughter can boost our immune system, reduce stress hormones, and even improve cardiovascular health. A recent meta-analysis found that people with an optimistic outlook had a 35% lower chance of suffering from a cardiovascular event.
Acceptance
To accept that life can get pretty serious sometimes. There’s nothing funny about grief, loss, illness, gun violence or pandemics. Nonetheless, to accept regular doses of levity in our lives. While humor won’t cure every illness, inviting it in can make navigating hard times a little bit easier. It can point us toward other joys.
Agency
To make deliberate time for laughter in our daily lives. As my 90-something patient demonstrates, laughter connects us. It opens the door for empathy and compassion. So go ahead—watch a silly movie, read a hilarious book, or spend time with people who make you cackle and guffaw. It’s good for you.
To find humor in everyday life: Notice the ridiculous things your pets, kids, and friends do. Laugh at yourself on a regular basis. Text your friends with a few good jokes and notice how you feel when you hit “send.”
To practice smiling and laughing: Even if you don't feel like laughing, the physical act of smiling and laughing can improve your mood. So get in front of a mirror and break out your best smiles. Practice your laugh “library” with your kids. Identify your speciality—Is it the guffaw? The cackle? The snort at the end? You can even try laughter yoga to get your giggle on. Try it! It works.
To try new things, take risks, and do your best not to worry too much about what other people think. Recently I played tennis with my cousins and nieces for the first time in years. I’ve never laughed harder when, racing to hit a long ball, I lunged so hard the racket flew out of my hands (and I wet my pants just a little bit). Meanwhile the ball was nowhere in sight. 😆
Humor can be used to deny reality and to deflect hard conversations. But sometimes it helps us live in the moment. Finding joy and even some silliness while we are here helps to remind us of the pleasures of being human. If we squint hard enough, we can locate levity just about anywhere. So ask yourself to think about the hardest time in your life. Can you find the laughter somewhere? I’d love to hear about it. 🙏
This week on the pod!
Humorist and social media sensation, Caitlin Murray, insists that laughter helped get her and her son Callum through his cancer treatment.
I have discovered the importance and power of being grateful for every blessing. I have also learned that keeping a sense of humor and laughing at the absurd, the mundane and everything in between will save your sanity.
Callum beat cancer, and Caitlin’s star kept rising. As the main character of the wildly popular Big Time Adulting Instagram page and podcast, Caitlin has captured the hearts of parents everywhere with her raw, relatable, and hilarious commentary about raising kids.
So listen, learn, and laugh with Caitlin. She is living proof that humor is healthy.
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How have you found humor during an especially hard time? When has levity helped you cope?Share your story here, and your answer could be posted in this Friday’s Health Huddle.
Disclaimer: The views expressed here are entirely my own. They do not reflect those of my employer, nor are they a substitute for advice from your personal physician.
Laughter and good friends have seen me through some tough times. I had no idea it was so good for me!
So, so true. My friend teaches Laugh Yoga through Arlington County Central Library. It is accessible via Zoom. The first Monday of each month at 7pm. Free. I highly recommend. Just laughing with a friend over something silly is pretty great as well!