Such an excellent article. Research shows that a client can tell in the first three sessions if the therapist is right for them, and this is the most important metric for change. Over and over again, the research also shows that the primary predictor of healing for a client is if they experience a safe and empathic connection with their therapist.
Jun 12, 2023·edited Jun 12, 2023Liked by Dr. Lucy McBride
Hi! BINGO!! I'm a marriage and family therapist in NY and my clients and I explore this important aspect of their goals and treatment plans throughout their work in therapy...with WORK as the keyword! No magic erasers or wands to depend on and creating an inspirational and motivational relationship in their therapeutic process is everything. And the more both the therapist and the clients are invested, the more enriching the therapy-for all parties! . :)
"See some results in 3 to 5 visits" and "if not, it may be time to reassess the patient-therapist relationship" is an excellent gauge. Unfortunately, many therapists are not up for a truly safe relationship, as they are not safe within themselves. Of the dozens of therapists I've seen over the years---12 in the past 5 years--only one, trained in the Neuroaffective Relational Model (NARM) has had the capacity to truly and safely connect. Others have caused harm and great harm through their inability to offer safe connection.
NARM is neuroscience-based, somatically oriented, and inherently non-shaming, non-pathologizing, and non-coercive.
"Pushing" and coercion actually thwart the client's natural process. I've experienced this with all but my NARM therapist. It is harmful. What's the point in therapy if the therapist stops the process?
This video from NARM founder Dr. Laurence Heller explains therapist efforting and agenda well. In fact, it's what helped me understand what my now former Somatic Experiencing therapist was doing that was so frustrating and distressing. She had her own agenda. It came from a positive conscious intention, but her subconscious intention was to shut down my process so she would not feel her own discomfort with my process. That was a horrible experience no client should ever undergo. But most therapists do this often and can't stop themselves even after it's brought to their attention. This makes them UNSAFE for therapy. So sad!
Such an excellent article. Research shows that a client can tell in the first three sessions if the therapist is right for them, and this is the most important metric for change. Over and over again, the research also shows that the primary predictor of healing for a client is if they experience a safe and empathic connection with their therapist.
Yes, I believe the data! Thanks for the kind words.
Hi! BINGO!! I'm a marriage and family therapist in NY and my clients and I explore this important aspect of their goals and treatment plans throughout their work in therapy...with WORK as the keyword! No magic erasers or wands to depend on and creating an inspirational and motivational relationship in their therapeutic process is everything. And the more both the therapist and the clients are invested, the more enriching the therapy-for all parties! . :)
Thanks for your feedback. I wholeheartedly agree w you!
"See some results in 3 to 5 visits" and "if not, it may be time to reassess the patient-therapist relationship" is an excellent gauge. Unfortunately, many therapists are not up for a truly safe relationship, as they are not safe within themselves. Of the dozens of therapists I've seen over the years---12 in the past 5 years--only one, trained in the Neuroaffective Relational Model (NARM) has had the capacity to truly and safely connect. Others have caused harm and great harm through their inability to offer safe connection.
NARM is neuroscience-based, somatically oriented, and inherently non-shaming, non-pathologizing, and non-coercive.
"Pushing" and coercion actually thwart the client's natural process. I've experienced this with all but my NARM therapist. It is harmful. What's the point in therapy if the therapist stops the process?
This video from NARM founder Dr. Laurence Heller explains therapist efforting and agenda well. In fact, it's what helped me understand what my now former Somatic Experiencing therapist was doing that was so frustrating and distressing. She had her own agenda. It came from a positive conscious intention, but her subconscious intention was to shut down my process so she would not feel her own discomfort with my process. That was a horrible experience no client should ever undergo. But most therapists do this often and can't stop themselves even after it's brought to their attention. This makes them UNSAFE for therapy. So sad!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBHUcGZvFS0