As I head out this morning for a biopsy of a "concerning area", I join you in enacting intelligent, self loving behavior.. Yes, I certainly hope that I I may be fortunate enough to find the remnant of an old intercostal injury and not metastasis from breast cancer. But if whatever it is turns out to be , indeed, diagnosable and treatable, I am still ahead of the game. My wish for us and for everyone else is that we are diagnosable and treatable and that we find the relief from the pain of anxiety that comes from "knowing"and being given an opportunity act on behalf of our health.The optimum would be a return to full health. L'Chaim. To Life.
First, and foremost I wish for the best with your condition. And I admire your courage and wisdom for seeking help, You may have procrastinated but in the end, you did make that decision to find out why your body was causing you pain. Something really struck a chord with me. When you said 'I hadn't considered the possibility that two things could be true at once in my own body.'
We shake with joy. We shake with grief. What a time they have, these two, housed in the same body. Mary Oliver
A few months ago you talked about 'stories' that we tell ourselves, when often they are only just that: 'stories'! It really resonated with me. We tell ourselves stories about our identity, and we need to examine these stories to see if they are actually true. In order to do that, we must let go of certainty, and look deeply to see where these stories originated and if they still hold true. I am sixty-seven years of age and on a daily basis I still examine my own 'maps of reality' and when I see that my belief systems are not true, I disregard my own beliefs accordingly. Being still in my mindfulness practice really helps. You have done the right thing. You did ask for help in the end. And make sure you do what your doctor tells you to do! LOL Take care and Kind regards Colin
Yes! After months of trying to relieve excruciating back and leg pain by rolling around on lacrosse balls, body scan meditations, massage and PT, I finally got the MRI and saw the disc spilling freely into my spinal canal. By that point, my right foot had developed a bit of a drag, which was alarming, to say the least. Saying yes to surgery was easy. I'm scheduled for next month. Deep breathing helps, but it's not sucking that disc back in. Good luck with your neck! I hope it resolves soon!
I had spinal surgery in 2019 that fused discs c4-7 in my neck. I have degenerative disc disease and now have issues with the discs below the fusion. I knew that could happen, have a great doctor and will have a mylegram next week.
I know stress is a contributing factor and have practiced all manner of methods to reduce it. But I feel somehow defective because I still haven’t learned to handle stress very well. I can feel my muscles tense and spasm and I can’t stop it.
I have PT with deep muscular release once per week. The next day I lock down again. Am I just tightly wound or is it because of the pain?
Thank you for sharing your experience. We heath care providers can be our own worst patient. I'm glad you were able to get some answers and are doing the right things. Stress and musculoskeletal issues totally coexist and feed off each other. The trick is breaking the cycle. Great job.
Loved this post, Dr. Lucy! So glad you got some answers and clarity moving forward. As you said, both things can be true at once. Thinking of you as you journey towards relief!
Will be following along your journey! Wishing you all the best. I think it makes sense that you tried to help yourself out mostly on your own first - and considering stress and its impact on pain is huge!
Lucy, you were not practicing DIY medicine. You were hoping for the best, as any good internist would. I, on the other hand, always assume the worst (as some ICU docs are want to do) and go for the most serious diagnosis. When my hip pain and left leg paresthesia indicated a pinched lumbar nerve, after PT and steroid injections helped very little, I was begging for neurosurgery. Feel better soon!
I am so sorry to hear! I read your first article with interest because I was also experiencing neck pain. Which became excruciating muscle spasms overnight for days…. Now I find myself in your shoes with the news of herniated discs pressing on nerve routes. I think all the spasming has really irritated the muscles because I’m still in a world of hurt. I am still waiting to see the PT and was given a date a month out to see the PM doctor for consult for the steroid shot. Not super helpful.
So … I appreciate your article. I’m sorry you’re going through the experience too! I hope you’re feeling better and will also be trying to avoid surgery right along with you!
When we are young we feel that the path should be clear with no obstacles in our way. The only environment in the natural world where this would hold true is in an arid desert, devoid of all life. So the path disappears again and again from view. There will be many times when we simply do not know how to proceed, where to go. Again, these are the times when we push through despite the fact that we do not know where the path will lead us. These are the times on the journey of life where all we can reasonably do is to simply stand in the ground of our own life, our own being, without trying to abstract ourselves into a better strategic future so that we don’t have to deal with the heartbreak of our lives; a vain attempt to escape the reality of our life. Life is complex. Each of us must make his or her own path through life. There are no self-help manuals, no formulas, no easy answers. The right road for one is the wrong road for another. The journey of life is not paved with blacktop; it is not brightly lit and it has no road signs. It is a rocky path through the wilderness. But, if we know exactly where we are going, exactly how to get there, and exactly what we’ll see along the way, we won’t learn anything.
And as we get older, there comes a point in our lives when all we can reasonably do is simply stop and stand where we are and realise that we, ourselves, are the journey- that the mere fact that we sought a path, a way through the darkness is enough. There is beauty and courage in that; the fact that we tried to seek a way through the wilderness. The most important lesson here is that the journey or path, itself, is really the goal- not some faraway abstract destination in the remote future or lofty ideas of becoming ‘enlightened’.
‘Each second we live is a new and unique moment of the universe; a moment that will never be again. And what do we teach our children? We teach them that two and two is four and that Paris is the capital of France. When will we also teach them what they are? We should say to each of them: ‘Do you know what you are? You are a marvel. In all the years that have passed, there has never been another child like you. Your legs, your arms, your clever fingers, the way you move. You may be a Shakespeare, a Michelangelo, a Beethoven. You have the capacity for anything. Yes, you are a marvel. And when you grow up, can you then harm another who is, like you, a marvel? You must work- we must all work- to make the world worthy of our children.’ Pablo Casals
I believe many who have worked in health care have, at some point, made a diagnosis and treatment plan for ourselves before obtaining all the info needed. So glad you sought out the help of another MD. Chronic pain can cause depression too. Your post, as always, is excellent! Take care of YOURSELF!!!
As I head out this morning for a biopsy of a "concerning area", I join you in enacting intelligent, self loving behavior.. Yes, I certainly hope that I I may be fortunate enough to find the remnant of an old intercostal injury and not metastasis from breast cancer. But if whatever it is turns out to be , indeed, diagnosable and treatable, I am still ahead of the game. My wish for us and for everyone else is that we are diagnosable and treatable and that we find the relief from the pain of anxiety that comes from "knowing"and being given an opportunity act on behalf of our health.The optimum would be a return to full health. L'Chaim. To Life.
First, and foremost I wish for the best with your condition. And I admire your courage and wisdom for seeking help, You may have procrastinated but in the end, you did make that decision to find out why your body was causing you pain. Something really struck a chord with me. When you said 'I hadn't considered the possibility that two things could be true at once in my own body.'
We shake with joy. We shake with grief. What a time they have, these two, housed in the same body. Mary Oliver
A few months ago you talked about 'stories' that we tell ourselves, when often they are only just that: 'stories'! It really resonated with me. We tell ourselves stories about our identity, and we need to examine these stories to see if they are actually true. In order to do that, we must let go of certainty, and look deeply to see where these stories originated and if they still hold true. I am sixty-seven years of age and on a daily basis I still examine my own 'maps of reality' and when I see that my belief systems are not true, I disregard my own beliefs accordingly. Being still in my mindfulness practice really helps. You have done the right thing. You did ask for help in the end. And make sure you do what your doctor tells you to do! LOL Take care and Kind regards Colin
Yes! After months of trying to relieve excruciating back and leg pain by rolling around on lacrosse balls, body scan meditations, massage and PT, I finally got the MRI and saw the disc spilling freely into my spinal canal. By that point, my right foot had developed a bit of a drag, which was alarming, to say the least. Saying yes to surgery was easy. I'm scheduled for next month. Deep breathing helps, but it's not sucking that disc back in. Good luck with your neck! I hope it resolves soon!
I had spinal surgery in 2019 that fused discs c4-7 in my neck. I have degenerative disc disease and now have issues with the discs below the fusion. I knew that could happen, have a great doctor and will have a mylegram next week.
I know stress is a contributing factor and have practiced all manner of methods to reduce it. But I feel somehow defective because I still haven’t learned to handle stress very well. I can feel my muscles tense and spasm and I can’t stop it.
I have PT with deep muscular release once per week. The next day I lock down again. Am I just tightly wound or is it because of the pain?
Thank you for sharing your experience. We heath care providers can be our own worst patient. I'm glad you were able to get some answers and are doing the right things. Stress and musculoskeletal issues totally coexist and feed off each other. The trick is breaking the cycle. Great job.
Loved this post, Dr. Lucy! So glad you got some answers and clarity moving forward. As you said, both things can be true at once. Thinking of you as you journey towards relief!
This was very moving and eye opening! 👀 May the wonders of PT and steroids lead you to pain free days. 🙏
I love you! Thank you for taking care of yourself and for telling us about it!
Will be following along your journey! Wishing you all the best. I think it makes sense that you tried to help yourself out mostly on your own first - and considering stress and its impact on pain is huge!
Lucy, you were not practicing DIY medicine. You were hoping for the best, as any good internist would. I, on the other hand, always assume the worst (as some ICU docs are want to do) and go for the most serious diagnosis. When my hip pain and left leg paresthesia indicated a pinched lumbar nerve, after PT and steroid injections helped very little, I was begging for neurosurgery. Feel better soon!
Sending healing vibes …
I am so sorry to hear! I read your first article with interest because I was also experiencing neck pain. Which became excruciating muscle spasms overnight for days…. Now I find myself in your shoes with the news of herniated discs pressing on nerve routes. I think all the spasming has really irritated the muscles because I’m still in a world of hurt. I am still waiting to see the PT and was given a date a month out to see the PM doctor for consult for the steroid shot. Not super helpful.
So … I appreciate your article. I’m sorry you’re going through the experience too! I hope you’re feeling better and will also be trying to avoid surgery right along with you!
THE JOURNEY
When we are young we feel that the path should be clear with no obstacles in our way. The only environment in the natural world where this would hold true is in an arid desert, devoid of all life. So the path disappears again and again from view. There will be many times when we simply do not know how to proceed, where to go. Again, these are the times when we push through despite the fact that we do not know where the path will lead us. These are the times on the journey of life where all we can reasonably do is to simply stand in the ground of our own life, our own being, without trying to abstract ourselves into a better strategic future so that we don’t have to deal with the heartbreak of our lives; a vain attempt to escape the reality of our life. Life is complex. Each of us must make his or her own path through life. There are no self-help manuals, no formulas, no easy answers. The right road for one is the wrong road for another. The journey of life is not paved with blacktop; it is not brightly lit and it has no road signs. It is a rocky path through the wilderness. But, if we know exactly where we are going, exactly how to get there, and exactly what we’ll see along the way, we won’t learn anything.
And as we get older, there comes a point in our lives when all we can reasonably do is simply stop and stand where we are and realise that we, ourselves, are the journey- that the mere fact that we sought a path, a way through the darkness is enough. There is beauty and courage in that; the fact that we tried to seek a way through the wilderness. The most important lesson here is that the journey or path, itself, is really the goal- not some faraway abstract destination in the remote future or lofty ideas of becoming ‘enlightened’.
‘Each second we live is a new and unique moment of the universe; a moment that will never be again. And what do we teach our children? We teach them that two and two is four and that Paris is the capital of France. When will we also teach them what they are? We should say to each of them: ‘Do you know what you are? You are a marvel. In all the years that have passed, there has never been another child like you. Your legs, your arms, your clever fingers, the way you move. You may be a Shakespeare, a Michelangelo, a Beethoven. You have the capacity for anything. Yes, you are a marvel. And when you grow up, can you then harm another who is, like you, a marvel? You must work- we must all work- to make the world worthy of our children.’ Pablo Casals
SCARED FOR THE CHILDREN
Billy skipped school again,
Looking like a fool again
What a little waste for
The taste of a big boy’s life.
Computer screens and magazines
Manufactured hopes and dreams.
Playing in a concrete box
Cause Mother’s got her shows to watch.
This is the end of the age of the innocent
One more game before they go.
This is the end of the age of the innocent.
What will we leave them with?-
I suppose we'll never know.
Processed greens and man-made meat
Running out of things to eat
Little boys having way too much fun
Playing with a big boy’s gun.
Oh, I’m scared for the children.
And on the day the last bird dies.
There won’t be a drop from their big square eyes-
An old man with his eyes like glass
Kisses the last blade of glass.
Oh, I’m scared for the children!
No respect for anyone
Why would they after what we’ve done
What an example we have set
What a planet we have left
Let’s be here for these children Colin Mac Rae
I believe many who have worked in health care have, at some point, made a diagnosis and treatment plan for ourselves before obtaining all the info needed. So glad you sought out the help of another MD. Chronic pain can cause depression too. Your post, as always, is excellent! Take care of YOURSELF!!!
I'm glad that you got answers to what has been happening.
And I wish you the best for your recovery. :).